A brand new term has begun here at Beach University, with all the attendant excitement and lofty goals for productivity. I, however, barely got anything done last week (week 1 of the quarter) because one of my oldest, dearest friends has been in the hospital – the ICU – for about two weeks. She’s been intubated for at least part of the time. She had complications after a c-section: infection, abscess, and distended belly. The baby’s four weeks old and she pretty much hasn’t had any normal time with her baby in her home. Her husband isn’t sure when she’ll be out if the ICU, let alone when she might get out of the hospital. It is BAD. I’ve cried. I’ve prayed. I’ve cursed the Gods for doing this to her. I’ve begged them to make her well. I’ve looked at pictures of her beautiful son over and over and over again. I’m stuck in Beachville waiting for a time when her husband says I can come see her.
My dear friend has a beautiful, healthy baby boy and she could still die because she gave birth to him.
So life happens.
She had great plans to have a natural home birth, but the baby was just too big and her labor was just too long, so she had a c-section – and thank the Gods western medicine gave her that option because she or the baby or both might have died otherwise. She had a pulmonary embolism while still in the hospital after the c-section and now she’s spent about two weeks in the ICU, close to death, as a result of complications from the c-section.
Now, my friend and her husband not only WANTED this child, they PLANNED this child. They decided they wanted to have a baby and she got pregnant shortly after they decided it was time to start trying. Many women, however, did not intend to get pregnant or can not continue the pregnancy for any number of reasons.
Pregnancy, labor, and child birth are literally life-threatening to women and I think we in the western world forget that. Women, even in America, regularly die from pregnancy and childbirth complications. Forcing a woman to continue a pregnancy, carry a child to term and deliver the baby is literally putting her life at risk and no one should ever be required to put her life in jeopardy against her will. Period.
I don’t give a shit what your religion says about it or what you believe. In America we do not have a national religion and our Constitution expressly forbids requiring religious allegiance to a particular religion. I give a shit about women who can, do and will die from pregnancy & childbirth complications and I care about the women who have, can and will die from unregulated abortions by untrained practitioners if abortion is made illegal in the United States.
The issue of woman continuing or terminating a pregnancy is NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS. Period. It is a decision she has to make on her own, with the advice of a doctor and her chosen confidants.
Pregnancy is potentially lethal to women. Women should not be forced to put their lives at risk. Abortion must remain legal and accessible. Period.
I’m pro-family. I’m pro-child. I’m pro-choice.
UPDATE:
C is out of the ICU, has almost all her tubes & IVs out, can move around, talk and HOLD HER BABY!!! Today I called while she was holding a sleeping baby, so I “only” talked to her hubby, but I could hear her…. Of course, I’m not about to believe that she’s really ok until I can see her and poke her (call me Doubting Thomas, whatever). So now I’m waiting for the call from them telling me it’s time for the week-long help with the new baby visit that I promised them before the baby was born.
In conclusion: Thank the gods for modern medicine.
UPDATE THE SECOND:
C was back into the hospital with more complications. She wasn’t there very long, but for the love of all that is good an holy, hasn’t she had enough? She is back out of the hospital again, but as I noted above (and it came true) I’m not going to think that she’s actually better until it’s been 2 months and I’ve seen her and poked her.